Obsessed with AGE

Recently I turned 26. Yes, I know. I am on the wrong side of 30! And mine is a typical Indian middle class family. So if you are a reader who has been through the same phase, you'll agree that there is nothing happy about being 26. In India this is the age when your "uncles & aunts" start to talk in hushed up tones, planning and strategising right infront of you. You will often get the same questions from literally any elder you meet, albeit a stranger to you. And I have tried replying to them in all ways possible - sarcasm, straight facts, pleading, and sometimes even dead-silence but sadly none work.

I don't understand what it is with Indians and Age. Right from birth all the activities we do is defined by age and nothing else. Its the age which determined my joining of school and some of my friends had to even fudge their birth certificates to get admission. It was age that determined when I got Brahmopadesham not my understanding of god or sanskrit. It was age that decided when I have to start working not my capability. It is age that will decide when I have to marry not my maturity. It is age that will define when I have to retire not my capability or ability.

Its surprising that for all other purposes we consider time to be cyclical. Be it yugas, rebirths or just handling multiple things at the same time, for us time is always cyclical. The western world considers time to be linear and for them to peg all their lives on age makes sense. But for our society its a paradox thats quite difficult for me to grab.

26 and counting...

Random Thoughts

Lately at work when I exchange morning pleseantries with colleagues I have mostly been asked the same question in reply - "Had your breakfast?" - I must appear either too obese or too frail.

I wonder if the ones I hold the door for, read a label on my face that says ‘Born to Hold the Door for YOU’. I get no thanks not even a smile, ok not even a glance. I have found a way out though, I say ‘You are welcome!’ out loud. That ends up me getting a look, if I am lucky that is. Anyways, I feel good about it.

Due to my stay in Mumbai for the past 2 years I have been doing a lot of air travel. If I am doing a web check-in I generally take the window seat 25A. Gives me a good view of the city when I take off and land without the wings playing spoil sport. Very recently I was flying to Pune from Bangalore. A very excited couple from Punjab occupied this seat that was already alloted to me. I requested them to give it back to me. Mr. Punjab enquired ‘Are you sure you want it?’ I would have given it up if that question was not asked; but I feel guilty all the same. I should have JUST let them be; so sorry excited couple from Punjab.

I ended up waiting on hold 20 minutes for the promised ‘5 minutes only’ that was requested by the Airtel customer care executive when I called to log my complaint for the 3rd time. 5 minutes more for the additional 2 minutes that she requested. I realized it was then time to tell her ‘If you had told me 25 minutes right at the beginning, I would have finished making other important calls after having waited for 15 mins when 2 minutes would be what they would have asked for’ and cut the call. I did say something to that effect subtly and if not exactly but didn’t cut the call.

Whenever I have revisited my blog it embarrasses me. And you?

I was not quite in the mood to make up a story around my thoughts, so I let them be - Random Thoughts.

A Jaunt to Alibaug

After a false alarm a week ago, we met at the Andheri station on a cool Saturday morning. As true MBA students we had no concrete plans. We knew only the destination, but none of them I feel were really concerned about it. It was the journey that had made eight sleepy heads to meet at 7.30 am. It had all forms of travel (except air) included in it. A train to Churchgate, a ferry ride followed by a bumpy bus ride. To throw in a couple more we also had a ride on a horse cart and a topsy-turvy boat ride. But what made all these low budget travel fun was the amazing group I was with. The entire journey was fun filled and never had a dull moment. There was no one moment that was "exiting" as most trips turn out to be, there was no one place we went to see, rather it was the entire day that made is so fun filled. Even a walk on the dusty streets in the midday sun was fun! There are so many small incidents that will be permanently etched in my mind. Waiting for the next jaunt.

Cheers guys :)

Career Planning

Our culture worships planning. Everything must be planned in advance. Our days, week, years, our entire lives. We have diaries, schedules, checklists, targets, goals, aims, strategies, visions even. Career planning is the most ridiculous of these cults precisely because it encourages a feeling of control over your reactions to future events. As that interview question goes: where do you see yourself in five years time? This invites the beginning of what starts as a little game and finishes as a belief built on quick sand. You guess what employers want to hear, and then you give it to them. Sometimes this batting back and forth of imagined futures becomes a necessary little game you play in order to 'get ahead'.

I personally don't know anyone who "really" knows what they want. There is some amount of dilemma in everyone that I know. That's why career planning, or at the very least just deciding what you're going to do next, is so unpleasant. When I was 18 people asked me what I wanted to do. There seem to be so many different options, each with myriad branching possibilities, many of which lead in opposite directions, but all equally tempting. But I gave back the answer that my parents wanted me to give. Not that they were pressurizing me or something, on the contrary the encouraged me to pick my own path. But I picked the tried and tested path to become a software engineer, not knowing what the future was, but still planning for it! Doesn't that sound ridiculous?

If it was tough to be a 18yr old, its even more nerve wrecking at quarter-life. Now it's more clear what the downsides of certain jobs are. There's not only our own experiences of work but we also have friends at work, all of whom colour our perception of their careers. This results in even more frantic planning, trying to correct the 'mistakes', which is a result of previous 'planning'. First of all it is not a mistake because no one can exactly predict the future and the second loophole is actually planning for the future. According to me, all of us are poor at predicting what would make us happy in the future. And since we all predict and then not reach the target, we feel unhappy (and curse all the gods and fate). This is pseudo-unhappiness.

The best strategy for career planning is this: make your best guess, try it out and don't be surprised if you don't like it. But for heaven's sake don't mention this in your interviews.

Diversity

I was thinking about diversity for sometime now. But the inspiration to put it to words came because of todays outing. It started with a visit to the biggest temple in Mumbai, Siddi Vinaik temple. For people coming from South India, especially Tamil Nadu and Karnataka, don't visit this one with an image of the temples back home. For starters, there is no aarti and we actually do a apradakshina, a complete no-no in temples back home. The flooring is marble, and the concept of prasadam is very different. From there we headed to Haji Ali Dargah, again the biggest in Mumbai. It was a surreal experience as it was my first time inside a Dargah. It helped me quash some preconceived notions. So a outing with diversity was quite good and I started to think about the other diversities that I have been facing in Mumbai.

My roommates make a amazing case study of diversity. The four of us are from four different parts of India. Akhil is from Rourkela (East), Rajat is from Delhi (North), Nirbhay is from Mumbai (West) and myself from Bangalore (South). So we have our own Golden Quadrilateral at 42 SeaShell :-) But what struck me the most was how similar we were in many things. People always say that India is a country of diversity. But at the end of the day we all remain almost the same, and I don't know whether to attribute this fact to 'Unity in Diversity' or the lack of any diversity at all.

My friends in college is also very diverse group. We have a Jain, a Sardar, a Gujju, Tulu speaking Shetty, a Marwadi. But again we are all so similar. So where does diversity come into picture?

A new gym

It had to come to an end sometime. And so it did, my illegal gymming at Andheri Sports Complex. I had taken a 3 month package way back in July and went to the gym till December. I think I was not alone in this kind of activity as the guards finally woke up and started checking the ID cards at the gate. Mine was way past the expiry date, so I had no other option than turn back before being manhandled by the guards.
I had a simple option - Go back and renew my membership or find a new gym. The renewal sounded better, but it came with a catch. The thing is, this gym was quite far from my home. So I had to take a auto everyday. And it cost me Rs25 to-fro. Even though the gym was relatively cheap at 600 pm, I used to spend more than 1000 pm. So I went to Zaf HealthClub, a high-end gym very close to my house. I ended up bargaining for a 12000 pa package which included gym, cardio, sauna, steam and locker facilities. The trainers seemed to know what they were talking, and the equipment was top notch. But what probably tilted the balance in favor of Zaf was the babes. After seeing 100kg aunties jogging on treadmills it was refreshing to see 50kg chicks working out ;-)
Hopefully I'll be able to use all those facilities regularly. More updates on the gym and my fitness later.

A fresh start

Ah... I have heard that before and lived it before... a fresh start is what I associate a new year with. It does not carry a huge significance in my life, as it is yet another day for me. But I don't live outside the society, so I play along. People associate the new year day with looking back at the year gone by, making resolutions for the year ahead and I have done that too. But I have come to realize this is what we should be doing every single day of the year and only time to live in the present day is on the day when you change calenders. Last year I did this, this year I'll do that... blah blah blah... I don't get it as to why people get so sentimental around this particular day. Live in the moment guys. Enjaaay it!
Anyways as I play along on such "holidays", Wishing everyone a happy and prosperous new year!